Well, to the surprise of only a certain ancient virgin-sacrificing civilization, we’re still here today. No one since A.D. 900 ever took the Mayans’ apocalyptic prophecy seriously because everyone knows certain things had to occur during 2012 for the end of days to be ushered in.

Well, to the surprise of only a certain ancient virgin-sacrificing civilization, we’re still here today. No one since A.D. 900 ever took the Mayans’ apocalyptic prophecy seriously because everyone knows certain things had to occur during 2012 for the end of days to be ushered in.

Because I fancy myself a svelte, less physically gifted Dr. Henry Jones Jr., but only in the sense that I, too, own a leather jacket with a fondness for hats, I’ve sifted through the ruins and read ancient scrolls only to discover key events had to happen. One by one, the harbingers of doom never came to pass, so I wasn’t really worried about boiling seas and fire from the sky.

Here are some of the events which had to happen, or be avoided, to trigger the Mayan equivalency of Ragnarok:

Mark Sanchez didn’t lead the New York Jets to a Super Bowl.

Kurt Busch didn’t win a NASCAR Sportsmanship Award.

Jerry Sandusky went to prison.

Bernie Ecclestone didn’t walk away from his Formula One empire, leaving all material goods behind, to become a Buddhist monk.

The BCS adopted a playoff system, sort of – well, enough to stave off Armageddon.

An American, Ryan Hunter-Reay, won a post-merger IndyCar Series championship.

Although this was at the 11th hour and cut it pretty close to the Dec. 21 deadline, Buffalo’s NFL franchise will not become the Los Angeles Bills for at least another decade.

Syracuse basketball coach Jim Boeheim was not fired, despite calls for his ouster after scandal plagued his program.

Danica Patrick did not win a NASCAR-sanctioned race.

Dish Network and AMC reached an agreement, albeit after Season 5 of “Breaking Bad” and one week following the season premier of “The Walking Dead.”

Chris Gill, me, won the 2012 Track Talk Points Championship.

Chris P. Bacon, host of Track Talk, did not win the Points Championship.

Notre Dame is back in the national championship game. Oh, wait, that’s a Catholic prophecy.

Brett Favre stayed retired.

The Los Angeles Lakers have a losing record, after acquiring Dwight Howard.

Leigh Diffey was hired to call IndyCar Series races for NBC Sports.

It was announced the “Star Wars” film universe will be directed by someone not named George Lucas.

The Baltimore Orioles made it back to the playoffs.

There were three perfect games pitched in Major League Baseball this season.

That’s it. So, until someone unearths the next extinct civilization’s doom's day prophecy and spreads it through social media sites like contagion at an all-you-can eat buffet, we should extend our gratitude all of the above for allowing us to proceed to 2013. Thanks everybody.

Chris Gill, sports writer for The Leader, can be reached at cmgill@the-leader.com or follow him on Twitter @TheLeaderGill.